Many thoughts ran though my mind. Felt so saturated til i just wana shut down like a computer. How could this happen to me? Why me? Argh. I dont understand. However, i knew i couldnt escape. I cant! Loser.

Anyways, It’s been a fulfilling week. First was meeting up with oldie friend. With unleashed hearts and minds, we chatted the whole day. Meanwhile, we strolled down to secret recipe for a taste of the sweet cakes. Then, we did what all girls do. A hairdo for one another (:

Half straight half curly. Cool? Thats my masterpiece alright!

Next was class chalet!

CHEERS

Two sleepless nights yet worth it (:

Of course, i needed some recovering from the lack of sleep. So, it was drama day. I watched and sleep.

What a wonderful week. However, all this will come to an end eventually. As, i need to settle down quickly for some commitments and discipline.

I CAN DO it right?

YES, I CAN

The familar place reeked the same old smell and the same old belongings. Back to where i was, I felt warmth and comfort there. Dolling up each other, playing the piano, doing work together. It was a good place to spent my weekends and I wished I could stay longer. However, i knew it would be a fairy tale when i wake up.   

Anyways, It was really a lovely day. We took a stroll to secret recipe and nibbled on the delicious cakes. Everything was perfect and memories of the past flashed through my mind swiftly. I miss my old self. I miss the past.

I miss

It was only 8am and I was awaken by my mum’s shouting. As I listen to her yellings, I realised that she wasnt nagging but crying out. I suppose she needed someone to vent her emotions and sorrowness. Seeing her red rudolf nose and the tears that broke their banks and trickled down. I shuddered in fear. It was such a rare sight. After much consolation she finally gave a broken smile. Heaving sighs of relieves, I lazed on bed and refused to wake up. Then, I began to browse through the cityharvest magazine. I came to a halt when the article on [choosing the right partner for life] caught my attention. hahas. There are 6 compatibility time bombs that can destroy a relationship, you know? 1. Significant age gap 2. Diff spiritual convictions 3.different social, ethnic or educational background 4. overbearing in-laws 5. long-distance relationships and lastly 6.conflicting financial priorities Gosh, Its really true and its happening in people’s life. A good source to gain some knowlegde. hee. My brain felt saturated and gradually, I dozed of till 11! Oops, I’m late for pw meeting! It was like a double fright morning.

It would be the second last pw meeting, since our op is on Friday. Once again, It was held at my leader’s house and i’m so gonna miss this ducky. I’m so witty to take a picture of it unknowingly, probably except the photographer (: 

Yes, we always work into dinner time.

Home not alone ^^

Anyways, the interesting part is that, I’ve got gege’s ipod! Yay! Now i can play [defuse bomb]  Got to thrash his top score, so i can savour Sakae. Good deal? I hope so (:  

I’m gonna try to bring him down now. see you (:

When everything seem so pleasant and right, I will start to ponder. Is this a dream? I dont wana wake up and face reality so quickly. It is as if something bad is looming. I’m worried. 

Anyways, had a great time with old pal. We had a wonderful time catching up and getting wild.

Cant blog much today since i’ve to turn in sooner. I hope we could rehearsal op thoroughly tmr, and also ensure a smooth transition.   

Tonight will be the night that i’ll fall for you, over again, dont make me change my mind.

Intially, I was thinking of lazing at home, but in the end, i agreed to go church with km. There are bombarding questions to be solved. Yet, i couldnt. Oh yes, i’ve learnt about the unusual way of reacting to any situation (: *breakthrough* hhmm, after church, we hang out in the nearest shopping mall. 

On the way to jp (: i shall spam pictures that we cam whored on the bus. hahas ready?

If your observant enough, they are of different effects (:  

Now, its the individual sexy pose of km and the sunshine smile of joy

Having no intention of purchasing any items, we stepped into giordano and decided to dress up. Without much hesitation i took my favourites picks and dash into any available changing room ^^

I gave into the irresistable obession. Oops. Guess which  one did i buy?

*drum rolls* its the green one! Because the white one was abit revealing at the back. Sexy back, you know ^^ My brother also found his new sexy black pants   He’s gonna make all the girls fall for him man! Yes, we are feeling a sense of satisfaction! Happily, we skipped out of the shop. Then we started craving for some icy stuff. So, we headed to the foodcourt for some redbean ice kajang!

Dont drool! hahas after savouring, we headed to TOY’R'US to find the kiddy hand phones which are required for Pw. Circling round and round, we discovered many types of unique toy phones. interesting!

Anyways, i had a wonderful day tho (: i’ve got to end abruptly. GOOD NIGHTS

i’ve been tearing for the past week and finally came to a halt because i saw HOPE. I’m feeling much better (: THANK YOU FOR YOUR ENCOURAGEMENT DEAREST ONES. When i thought nothing you could do or say when it comes to the truth, you guys picked me up and told me to hold on. Now, we are gonna make it through. Yes, we are. Through this incident, i’ve learnt alot. I’ve got to be stronger and little girl no more.

Time to focus on OP! we were on an errand to fulfil our PW wishlist. Here goes, cardboards,wires, cotton wool etc

kangming is sad.

Here comes timothy, a very helpful guy who didnt wana let girls carry the boxes ^^

Due to the greed of man, we wanted more! So, i lent a helping hand also (:

OP was quite a success after the chaos then ideas and hardwork. I’m really fortunate to be in such a cooperative and understanding group. Hey grpmates, let’s do it all the way til 6 of nov alright (:

Anyways, today, I went for a tetanus immunization injection. This was for the sake of going for the OCIP trip in batam. I hope it will be fun and memorable, since i sacrified. ouchh.. 

i was supposed to stay at home to do theory. But after picking up Jes’s call, i decided to head down to tampines IKEA to help her with the proposal. I made a good friend right? Yes, i know. Together with 3 pretty babes and two handsome guys, we roamed around IKEA to check out the prices of the furniture.

lovely girls. Do you want their no.s? i’m sorry, but they are mine ^^

Yes, gluttons! We ate swish meatballs :D

After eating, we did some shopping spree exercise

Kimberly and me will be incharged of the finale! hahas, we thought of candles. Sounds familar right? it only takes a spark, to get the fire going and soon all those around, can warm up in its glowing.. PASS IT ON , pass it, pass it on.   

Later, Weifeng and Kang Ming came with empty stomaches. Luckily, we were almost done with our work. So, we accompanied them to the cafe again! It was time to slack while brainstorm for more ideas!

Look, they were once studious.  

We had a great gossip session Now, It’s time to say goodbye (:

Hey brother, thank you for being there always, when i was about to give up.

goodbye my friends

i’ve lots to say.

 yet when i wana do it, i’m lost of words.

i cant sort things out.

i dont wana breakdown and cry

but i couldnt take it.

i’m tire.

are you happy?

i dont know.

i’ve lost all my dreams and hope.

should i die?

no? because my parents love me?

and that’s childish?

..there are always other solutions.. blah blah blah blah..

if i could accept the alternatives,

why does my heart still hurt badly?

How thankful it would be if i were to lost my sense of feel

then i would not be suffering.

am i a loser?

i sound like one,

but your not me.

you dont understand.

so, dont ever say that.

i just feel like shutting myself down

away from the realistic and materialistic world.

tears filled my eyes, and it blinded my vision. i have no energy to smile. friends? i dont wana affect their mood. parents? i dont wana make them worry. leave me alone?

goodbye

Hey diary, its been a long time since i blogged. hahas, and i suppose the nxt post would be after promos? yeah certainly. Anyways, its time to hit the book! Neither do I wana be kicked out of sch nor retain, so, I had better buck up (:

I always hope to see some achievements in my life. Yet, time after time, I always disappoint myself. Nevertheless, I wish to see a change in my life for this coming promotional exam. I wish that I could be more focus while studying and be consistent and persistent when facing difficulties. I wana stop that emo within me. Let me put it aside til the end of my exams. hahas.

Shall reward myself after promos and pw, and here goes the list of interest stuff to do after exams (:

1. Hibernate

2. shop til i drop

3. Go for facial, mani, pedi and massaging (optional)

4. Play gb til i get bored

5. Chat, webcam on msn like never before

6. Attend outings

7. Go for chalets

8. Be a better volleyballer

9. Go overseas for relaxation

1o. play the piano til my fingers cramp

11. meet up with old friends

12. Complete grade 8 theory

13. Stay joyful

14. watch more dramas and catch more movies

15. Search for something that will interest me. Probably, i should go learn knitting or baking ?!

16. AH! I can draw.

17. More to add on, just havent thought of it (: 

Hhhmm, sadly, for now, press on classmates and teachers :D  

You go girl!

I don’t know why
You want to follow me tonight
When the rest of the world
With whom I’ve crossed and I’ve quarreled
Let’s me down so
For a thousand reasons that I know
To share forever the unrest
With all the demons I possess
Beneath the silver moon
Maybe you were right
But baby I was lonely
I don’t want to fight
I’m tired of being sorry

With all the vampires and their brides
We’re all bloodless and blind
And longing for a life
Beyond the silver moon
Maybe you were right
But baby I was lonely
I don’t want to fight
I’m tired of being sorry
I’m standing in the street
Crying out for you
No one sees me
But the silver moon
So far away – so outer space
I’ve trashed myself – I’ve lost my way
I’ve got to get to you
Maybe you were right
But baby I was lonely
I don’t want to fight
I’m tired of being sorry
I’m standing in the street
Crying out for you
No one sees me
But the silver moon
Maybe you were right
But baby I was lonely
I don’t want to fight
I’m tired of being sorry
I’m standing in the street
Crying out for you
No one sees me
But the silver moon

On the contrary

I don’t wanna hear,
I don’t wanna know
Please don’t say you’re sorry
I’ve heard it all before
And I can take care of myself
I don’t wanna hear,
I don’t wanna know
Please don’t say ‘forgive me’
I’ve seen it all before
And I can’t take it anymore
You’re not half the man
you think you are
Save your words
because you’ve gone too far
all your stories
I’ve listened to your lies and
(Listen to your stories)
You’re not half the man
you’d like to be
I don’t wanna hear,
I don’t wanna know
Please don’t say you’re sorry
I’ve heard it all before
And I can take care of myself
I don’t wanna hear,
I don’t wanna know
Please don’t say ‘forgive me’
I’ve seen it all before
And I can’t take it anymore
Don’t explain yourself
cause talk is cheap
There’s more important things
than hearing you speak
Mistake me cause I made it so convenient
Don’t explain yourself, you’ll never see
(Sorry, sorry, sorry)
Forgive me…
I’ve heard it all before
I don’t wanna hear,
I don’t wanna know
Please don’t say you’re sorry
I’ve heard it all before
And I can take care of myself
I don’t wanna hear,
I don’t wanna know
Please don’t say ‘forgive me’
I’ve seen it all before
And I can’t take it anymore
Don’t explain yourself
cause talk is cheap
There’s more important things
than hearing you speak
I’ve heard it all before

Its just a matter of being immune to it. Just face it, life isn’t fair. Stop procrastinating, it doesn’t make a difference. Hold onto your words, because talk it cheap.

I tried walking towards you, but yet time after time, i failed. What does this imply? Am i suppose to wait? i DON’T KNOW.

Happy birthday sisters